Dating Site Tips

Tip #1:
Different sites offer different rates and plans. Generally a subscription is around 20-30 dollars a month. However if you subscribe for a 3 or 6 month period, they will often offer you discounts per month. Remember, their business thrives on being able to show that they have a LOT of members.

Tip #2:
Sometimes sites will allow you to search the site for available men in your area for FREE.

It’s a great way to get an idea of what’s available before you plunk down your money.

Those rules change all the time, so poke around when you get to a site and see if that option is available.

Tip #3:
Another nice option for women (not men) is that if you decide to stop your subscription to a site, some sites will allow you to stay for FREE for a couple of months – as a way to maintain their population of women.

In other words –- they will offer you all kinds of incentives to keep your profile up.

But of course, you can’t know that until you attempt to end your subscription.

SECRET TIP: Begin the “End My Subscription” process every three months or so and see what special offers your dating site offers you! You could save some good money!

Tip #4:
Just because you resign from a site does not mean they will take your photo and profile down.

Again – the dating sites want people who are browsing the site to believe there are lots and lots of people actively searching. So, sometimes, they will de-activate your account but leave your profile up.

This has caused me lots of trouble once – because when I started dating someone seriously, one of her friends saw my profile still up and thought I was cheating on her.

Solving this problem is relatively easy. Just make sure that when you withdraw from a site, you fill out the box that says you want your profile taken down. Sometimes a site will give you an option to hide your profile, just in case you want to re-activate it later. That’s fine, too.

Sometimes, you may want to just stop dating on this site but leave your profile up for free as a kind of long-line bait, as in fishing. I’ve done this. Just leave up your profile, then come back three months later and see who’s been biting. You might have caught a great guy’s interest while you were off traveling or just taking a break.

Tip #5:
Get yourself on one of the big dating sites – Match or Yahoo, where the selection is widest. But ALSO get yourself on a niche site as well – something that is more specific to your tastes or passions. Double your chances of success.

Tip #6
Don’t stay on any one site for too long. You kind of always want to seem like a fresh face. So if you are on Match.com for 3 months and it’s pretty good, resign, take down your photo and move over to YahooPersonals for 3 months. Then, if you do go back to Match, you will appear as someone new, which makes catches the eye of men. Everybody likes to click on the “who’s new” or “search by join date” button.

Tip #7
Be nice to everyone! Sometimes men and women act out their aggressions online since you don’t have to actually look another human being in the eye. They will respond to an email with an attitude such as, “Ew – you think I would go out with you, you Mountain Troll?”

Well, the truth is that Mountain Troll might be a great human being who has a friend who is a George Clooney clone. People are people. You don’t HAVE to respond to every email. But if someone writes you a kind or thoughtful letter but you don’t think you are a dating match – send a nice note back and let them know that they seem great but that you don’t see romantic match there. Maybe he doesn’t want more kids. Or maybe he lives too far. The key thing is, be clear and kindly firm. And if he writes back in a nice way – you may have a new friend in this world. You can later invite him to a party or to meet up with a bunch of people at a local bar or club or event – without romantic expectations. If he writes back a nasty letter – REPORT him to the dating site service. If he keeps pursuing you romantically and doesn’t take your words seriously, then he doesn’t take you seriously. Stop writing back. If you want, you can then BLOCK him from writing you. Most dating sites make that option easy.

The basic principle: just as in real life. Be kind and polite, but firm. And don’t take any sh*t from anyone! You
deserve better.

Tip #8
Always check off the box that says “do you want to receive matches by email?” Let them send it to you three times a week. Basically, their bot searches profiles and throws a selection of men your way. 90% may be wrong for you, but you might discover the one guy who is great for you. And you might not have found each other by chance. So increase your chances of success. Receive their Your Matches by email as often as they offer it.

Tip #9
Have fun with this! Play a little. Experiment with your voices, don’t take the “first date” so seriously. Think about it: when else in history have women been able to meet so many men of different types so easily? Dating is supposed to be fun. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Enjoy the attention and enjoy the dance of flirting. You’ll know when the right guy comes along.

I like to think of online dating as just another practice of marketing. I know, it may seem unromantic on the surface, but seen from another angle, it’s fun. It’s a way of thinking: how can I maximize my success with the least amount of effort.

And who doesn’t want THAT?

Please enjoy the breakdown of sites below, and please let me know your experiences so I can work them into my research.

Best,

Adam